Sunday, August 10, 2008

Patience Pays

If you have some time, go back and read some of the first posts I made when starting this blog. In my second post I wrote:
My goal is to attend a social nudist event soon, and hopefully I will convince my wife to come along, preferably a swim. I have sent several e-mail inquiries to a couple of local groups, but have yet to receive an answer.
That was three years ago. As time has passed, this blog has gravitated from a personal diary to somewhat of a running commentary on the political and social ramifications of nudity. One of the reasons I stopped the personal posts was simply because there was nothing noteworthy to blog about.

But yesterday was a real milestone. After living with a nudist husband for three years, my wife finally went with me to a naturist venue, and I am very happy to say that she loved the experience, and is eager to go again.

She says that it was easy getting naked, but the worst part was walking from the car to the pool, but that anxiety soon passed. She says that laying nude in the sun beside a pool on a gorgeous summer's day was one of the most relaxing experiences she ever had.

I told her time and time again that I would never insist that she join me at naturist events, and that it would make no difference in our marriage. Wisely, she allowed me to go by myself, trusting that my motivations in seeking out my nudist needs were unrelated to our relationship. This was more about me than about us. In return, I never applied any pressure that she go along.

Once, about a year ago, she said that she was thinking about going with me to a local naturist swim, but due to various reasons it never happened. In hindsight, that was a very good thing, because the gender imbalance of the local swims would likely have proved uncomfortable for her, and when she met the club president she found him to be a little "creepy".

So when I made a male friend at a visit to a landed club, we began talking about the women in our lives. Turns out he had a girlfriend who was willing but reluctant, much like my wife. We decided to ask our respective partners if they would like to meet, and perhaps from there pursue a joint first time experience for the two women.

It sounds a little devious, but all intentions were sincere. We made it clear that if the women were to accompany us to a resort, it would be because they wanted to do it for themselves, and not for us. As it turns out, they liked each other, were receptive to the idea, and we all agreed to go.

It was the right time, the right place, and the right company. Being patient for the optimum opportunity paid off for all four of us.

My wife and I have also told our daughter about our visit, as well as a couple of friends, with very positive reactions. It turns out that we might have a couple of more people who want to tag along with us the next time. This is the heart of the dilemma faced by most nudists and naturists, that we strongly believe that the nude human body is good, and that there is no reason for shame, yet most of us hide our lifestyle from family, friends and co-workers. I fully realize that not everyone is as lucky as me when it comes to revealing naturist tendencies, so people need to think hard before they make these personal decisions.

Deep down I believe that everybody wants to experience the freedom of naturism, but that our social and religious traditions and teachings are very powerful obstacles to overcome. I applaud the courage of my wife, and my friend's girlfriend, for having enough trust and faith to leap over those hurdles, and shed some of those old false fears and beliefs.

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Anonymous said...

This is great news. I'm very happy for you two!

Greetings from Switzerland

Anders said...

I recognize my situation in what you're writing.
My fife has been reluctant but understanding towards my nude side. She even recognized the good sides of social nudity, but I was the one looking up info and reading up on the subject.
Eventually, this summer, we went as a whole family (of four) to the nude beach 20km away, and she wanted to return so we have gone a couple of times since.
She has also been the one talking positively about it to friends and relatives after it.
Congratulations to you and your family, have fun!

Rick said...

Congratulations. I'm glad she enjoyed her visit and will join you at other venues.

Gorik said...

Congratulations again!
I have same experience this summer - I and my wife went to our local nude beach. She was a little uncomfortable to taking clothes off, but she did it, even faster than me :-) She had enjoy this way very much, but she had been modesty to talk about it even with me, and she wished to keep it as secrete from our friends and relatives.
Some weeks later I had suggested her to watch full solar eclipse, which occurs at 1st August in my native Novosibirsk city. And we met this incredible event in our birthday suit. It was amazing.
After some conversation my darling decided that is no reason to keep this secret, but either no reason to broadcast it.
Unfortunately, we have very short summer here to full enjoying our new way.

Brian said...

I was originally hesitant to tell anyone about my nudist habits. One day, I simply felt the need to uncork the bottle and told one of my friends. After her surprised, but accepting reaction, the truth eventually came out to all of my friends. Most expressed jealousy.

What I've realized is that many people want that that type of freedom. They want to take it off and just enjoy the world for what it is. They're simply scared of being outcast as the minority, which isn't true.